Am I 20 or 30

I’m lying in bed after what seemed like one of the most exhausting days of my summer (although it wasn’t) and I can’t help but think how tired I am. I love the feeling of being busy but I hate the way over-tiredness makes me feel. I guess this is normal. I don’t really know anyone who likes being tired. These past months have been just that - tiring. I’ve thought a lot about the older I’m getting because I am. As time continues I will never be as young as I am today and thinking about that is weird.

This summer I decided to do something different and stay on campus to work. I’m in a different city year round to study so these three months of freedom were essentially the only time I had to go home and I didn’t. I decided to stay not so I could go out with friends every night but because I needed to be responsible and work to pay off the debts I owe and the necessities I need (rent, credit cards, etc.). A lot of me is happy that I did because I did the right thing but so much of me wishes I was home, drinking lemonade, and surrounded by my immediate family. Instead, I spent three months working two jobs, getting as much sleep as I could and drinking an abundance of coffee.

Although I have said to myself “am I 20 or 30” way too often this summer, I enjoyed myself. It is a delight watching myself grow as a person and [young] adult. Feeling tired just comes with that. I guess it’s better to feel tired because you’re doing something than to feel tired for not doing anything at all, right?

As the summer simmers down and the leaves begin to fall, I am excited for a new quarter and season. Ending this month I will begin my fourth and final year of university. Being a student is all I have ever known and to think that this role is almost over is scary + beautiful.
I'll be starting a new position tailored toward what I want to do when I'm done and I am nervous but ready. This fiscal year also brings a lot of responsibilities. I am happy to share that I will be 1 of 2 campus corespondents for my universities Her Campus chapter. I have never run an organization and I know it will be difficult but I am also aware it will bring so much fun. I am excited, very very excited. 

One more thing.. 

Hello, I rebranded my blog. As many of you know this blog was Delightfully Chaotic for a long time. It is a title I am happy to have obtained. My life continues to be delightfully chaotic and will possibly always be but I am happy to be Dear Anaaa (yes the three a's are necessary). Dear Anaaa was the name I chose for my Twitter handle back in 2010 when I realized I no longer wanted to be a Nick Jonas fan account. It is a name that has grown with me and that encompasses the ultimate goal of this blog, growth. I hope you enjoy and stay awhile. 

Here's to growing up, being okay with 20 or 30, and my life long relationship with coffee. Happy September and goodbye to the warmest of seasons. 

Ana Rosa12 Comments