Missing the Point of the Ocean
A couple of months ago my aunt accidentally told me that another aunt of mine told her what I was feeling. My aunt literally told her my emotions on my behalf and justified this by telling her she knew based off of my actions. Though I was clearly upset I didn't confront my aunt about the situation. A couple of weeks ago, my sister expressed to us that she missed my grandmother who is currently away. I understood how she felt since I missed her too. Shortly after my sister shared this, another aunt (go figure) told her that she did not miss my grandmother and that she was lying. At this point I didn't know whether to laugh or grab the apple that was directly to the right of me and throw it at a wall. It’s funny that there are people who believe they know what someone is feeling based upon the engagements they choose to show. I am aware that the way someone portrays themselves externally is important. If somebody is up and leaping and humming you would think that this person is happy or content, but they could have had a shit morning and chose not to show the world just how shitty it was. Someone wouldn't know this unless they were told. So how could my aunt possibly know how i was feeling if I don’t recall telling her so?
Right after my sister was told she was lying I turned to my aunt and said no. no you do not know just how much she misses her grandmother and no you do not get to tell her so. No. no. no. there are people walking this world who are broken and look fine. There are people who are crying and giggling and who are frightened and nervous and happy and sad and you don’t get to determine this by your observations. Someones presence can lie and it will never show what’s inside. Unless my sister, any being, or I share with you our true feelings, please do not base what you think we feel on the appearance we choose to show... but ask.
“There's nothing wrong with enjoying looking at the surface of the ocean itself, except that when you finally see what goes on underwater, you realize that you've been missing the whole point of the ocean. Staying on the surface all the time is like going to the circus and staring at the outside of the tent.”
-- Dave Berry